“Why is it that when I tell a guy I don’t like him the same way he likes me, he stops texting and talking to me? …I mean, I still want to be friends…”
You’re that social butterfly who loves nothing better, than to get out there and make new friends. But what happens when guys come along? …Misinterpreted signs. Extreme happiness which suddenly plunges into heartbreak. Many tears…
New Start, New Beginnings
“You have received an offer for your first CAO course DN500. Please accept or reject this course before 17:15”, the long awaited text message screamed at me. After two long years of hard work, tears, stress, upcoming exams (which never seemed to go away), and expectation, I had finally made it. My heart started pounding in my chest, and I dissolved into a puddle of happy tears.
I think what I love the most about university, is that it’s so different than school. I mean, the pressure to conform is no longer placed on our shoulders. Instead I feel free to embrace the super quirky, individualistic person I am. I entered university knowing no one, and plenty of other people were in the exact same boat. Instead of fantasizing friendships and waiting for others to bounce up to me, and ask me if I wanted to be friends, I sat between two different people every day in my lectures, and got to know them. Suddenly for the first time in my life, I found myself experiencing popularity and acceptance. The one people bounced up to if they wanted a chat. The person who was usually in the middle of a crowd. The person everyone looked up to, and wanted to be friends with. But then came the admires…and just as fast as they came, they left. ..and just as quick as I was happy, I felt torn, with a numbing sense of guilt and impending doom.
“What do you mean you don’t know? Kaylinn, you either want to go out with me, or you don’t!”
How do you tell a guy that you don’t feel the same way about them, as they evidently feel about you? The highlight of university for me, was the social aspect; getting to see new faces, making new friends and creating some new experiences…definitely not get tied down into a relationship. The past has sadly taught me that no matter what a guy promises, no matter how much he declares he will always be there for you and never let you down, he always will. I’m tired of trying to mend broken relationships, where the patience is still there to put it back together, but the glue is missing, and no matter just how much you try to gather up all the shards of glass, the only thing that happens is you keep cutting yourself with the splinters. I’m sick of guys coming and going in my life, and think I’d rather stay single, at least I know that no one will ever let me down.
“Two are better than one, if one falls down, his friend can help him up”. To be straight and honest, right now, at this space in time, all I want is friends; people who will stay with me through the thick and thin, people that won’t tell me to shut up ‘cos my point is irrelevant, people that love me for who I am as a person and people that I can confide in. Right now, I don’t feel as if one of these people includes a boyfriend…! Of course, I’m not going to stay celibate for life, but if I start going out with a guy, I want to have known him for more than three days, at least!! I don’t get why some fellas find it hard to comprehend this!! I’m not the type of girl you will see on a night out, with her tongue glued into another guys……not at all! -And if that is defined as “normal behavior”, I do not ever want to be classified as a “typical girl”.